LITTLE TECHNO JOHNNY
Little Johnny asks: "Daddy, how was I born?"
Daddy says, "Ah, my son, I guess one day you will find out anyway, so I may as well tell you now.
"Well, you see, your Mom and I first got together in a chat room at MSN. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room where your Mother agreed to download from my hard drive.
"As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the Delete button, nine months later a blessed little Popup appeared and said, 'You've got male!'"
EVERYTHING HAS A PORPOISE
A research group on sea mammals captured a rather odd porpoise on one of its trips. Its peculiarity was that it had feet. After they had photographed and measured the poor thing, they prepared to set it free.
"Wait a minute," said one of the researchers, "Wouldn't it be a kindness if our ship's doctor here were to amputate the feet so that it would be like other porpoises?"
"Not on your life," exclaimed the doctor. "That would be defeeting the porpoise."
A blond enters a store that sells curtains. She tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains."
The salesman assures her that they have a large selection of pink curtains. He shows her several patterns, but the blond seems to be having a hard time choosing. Finally she selects a lovely pink floral print. The salesman then asks what size curtains she needs. The blond promptly replies, "Fifteen inches."
"Fifteen inches?!" asked the salesman. "That sounds very small. What room are they for?"
The blond tells him that they aren't for a room, they are for her computer monitor.
The surprised salesman replies, "But Miss, computers do not need curtains!"
The blond replies, "Hellllooooooooo ... I've got Windoooooows!"