Today, we're pleased to present a guest post contributed by the One and Only Scary Monster. No, this monster won't be found hiding under your bed or crouching in your closet. This gentle, sentient creature who loves to STOMP around in the guise of Scary Monster can be found lurking in the shadows of the Blogosphere, always ready, willing, and able to make you smile and ... think.
APHROISMS, by Scary Monster
Hell, there are no rules here -- we're trying to write a post!
Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, chances are you probably got it from someone else's blog.
Blogging is 80% confusion, 15% preparation, and 13% reciprocation.
That's more than 100% satisfaction!
Love could fix all the problems in the world if it found time to get out of bed.
Never tattoo your lover's name on your body, unless the artist offers you a discount on cover-ups.
Food and dining:
Never let the in-laws carve the turkey. Putting weapons in the hands of a drunken enemy can't be good for your health; it also insults the bird.
Microwaving is cooking, it's just a streamlined version of it.
Just imagine what Michelangelo could have done with 30-minute print development.
On the Arts:
Being a writer and being creative are two different things.
Writers spend tons of money to buy the tools of their trade and labor over every word.
All you need to be creative is to come home at 3:00 in the morning, smelling of perfume, and you will create the most incredible tale ever told.
A bartender is an artist in the truest sense of the word.
Using a variety of medium, he produces works that are instantly intoxicating.
He wraps them up with intelligent banter.
And gets paid for every piece of work he produced, both good and bad.
When a teacher refuses to learn, then the student is truly in trouble; that's why we have Wikipedia.
Educating our youth about the arts is probably the easiest way to get them from playing video games. Salvador Dali produced infinitely more bizarre images than Nintendo ever did.