3/07/2007

Word Play


A few words with dual meanings:

1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female - Any part under a car's hood.
Male - The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female - Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male - Playing football without a cup.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female - The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male - Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female - A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male - Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female - A good movie, concert, play, or book.
Male - Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female - An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
Male - A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.

7. MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female - The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male - Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.

8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female - A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male - A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.

and

He said: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said: You wear pants, don't you?


Words Gone Wild defined by Twisted Linguistics:

heresay - You may state that in this one place and no other.

bi-product - Goods marketed to those who love everybody.

contract breeches - Special pants worn for contractual negotiations.

poping magic pills - Parochial medications with miraculous properties.

beef strokenoff - A lonely male model.

These words are “story” material, so look for them to pop up in something soon.


Did you know:

If you have none, look closely and you'll find one.
It would be odd if seven were even.
Her tears told him her fears were fact, not act.
One minute the goose was flying high, the next it was lying low.
Beat weapons into ploughshares; go from arms to farms.
Exercise your anger—spout instead of pout.
A dessert is heaven, a desert is hell, unless you're a cactus.
Stay and be happy; stray and be happier.
The gullible gather round the glib.
She was was oblivious to the obvious.
Being curt is easier than courteous, but lonelier.

9 comments:

littlebirdblue said...

6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.Female - An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
Male - A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.


And dogs. Dogs love flatulence. When dogs&guys get a little gassy repartee going, they truly bond.

Serena Joy said...

This is true. My dog truly enjoys it. She snores, too. She would have made a great little man.:)

Hale McKay said...

He said: "Where'd you get that shirt with the bumpers?"

She said: "The same place you got those pants with the stick shift."

Very good, SJ.

The dual meaning "thingies" - classic Teisted Liguistics - "did you know" - too much good stuff to comment on.

Vunderbar, bork-bork-bork.

Speaking of dogs, check out my Swedish Chef post.

Serena Joy said...

Love your "She said, he said," Mike. LOL.

I read your Swedish Chef. Unfortunately, so did my dog. Now she's totally bummed. Bork-bork.:)

Steve G said...

Now I can see what you are working so hard. Good luck.

Hale McKay said...

But it's a labor of love for both of us, Steve.

Serena Joy said...

I don't work that hard at my own blog, Steve. It's pretty much stream of consciousness. I do have to put a little effort into this one so as not to look like an idiot and embarrass Mike.:)

Hale McKay said...

NOt to worry, SJ, I was born
in bare assed.

Serena Joy said...

LOL, Mike. Come to think of it, I think I was, too.:)