It's All in the Numbers
Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving 100%? Some of us have been to a meeting where someone asks of us more than 100%. How about achieving 103%?
....If you can give them 103%, they'll ask for a couple of more percentage points. (Give them an inch, they'll expect a mile.)
For you skeptics who think 100% is the best one can do, you obviously never watched Star Trek: The Next Generation when Geordi La Forge squeezed out 103% efficiency from the main engines of the Enterprise.
Following is little math that might prove helpful. The letters of the alphabet are assigned a percent value 1 to 26 starting with A through Z. Thus:
"A-1, B-2, C-3, D-4, E-5, F-6, G-7, H-8, I-9, J-10, K-11, L-12, M-13, N-14, O-15, P-16, Q-17, R-18, S-19, T-20, U-21, V-22, W-23, X-24, Y-25 & Z-26."
As a result of this simple math, we come to some interesting facts for you to ponder.
HARDWORK (8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11) = 98%
KNOWLEDGE (11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5) = 96%
....So, it stands to reason that hard work and knowledge will get you close to perfection.
ATTITUDE (1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5) = 100%
BULLSHIT (2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20) = 103%
....Here we can see that attitude achieves a perfect score, while bullshit exceeds perfection. Now how about:
ASSKISSING (1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7) = 118%
....So therefore, those who can substitute Preparation H for Chap Stick tend to get ahead by exceeding expectations. Let's face it, the numbers add up! You will find the following especially interesting:
PRESIDENT (16+18+5+19+9+4+5+14+20) = 110%
....Impressive for running a country a by the seat of one's pants.
PROSTITUTE (16+18+15+19+20+9+20+21+20+5) = 163%
....She could run the country on her back!
So if you're thinking of a career change or just looking for a job remember, it's all in the numbers!
No.92
....If you can give them 103%, they'll ask for a couple of more percentage points. (Give them an inch, they'll expect a mile.)
For you skeptics who think 100% is the best one can do, you obviously never watched Star Trek: The Next Generation when Geordi La Forge squeezed out 103% efficiency from the main engines of the Enterprise.
Following is little math that might prove helpful. The letters of the alphabet are assigned a percent value 1 to 26 starting with A through Z. Thus:
"A-1, B-2, C-3, D-4, E-5, F-6, G-7, H-8, I-9, J-10, K-11, L-12, M-13, N-14, O-15, P-16, Q-17, R-18, S-19, T-20, U-21, V-22, W-23, X-24, Y-25 & Z-26."
As a result of this simple math, we come to some interesting facts for you to ponder.
HARDWORK (8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11) = 98%
KNOWLEDGE (11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5) = 96%
....So, it stands to reason that hard work and knowledge will get you close to perfection.
ATTITUDE (1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5) = 100%
BULLSHIT (2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20) = 103%
....Here we can see that attitude achieves a perfect score, while bullshit exceeds perfection. Now how about:
ASSKISSING (1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7) = 118%
....So therefore, those who can substitute Preparation H for Chap Stick tend to get ahead by exceeding expectations. Let's face it, the numbers add up! You will find the following especially interesting:
PRESIDENT (16+18+5+19+9+4+5+14+20) = 110%
....Impressive for running a country a by the seat of one's pants.
PROSTITUTE (16+18+15+19+20+9+20+21+20+5) = 163%
....She could run the country on her back!
So if you're thinking of a career change or just looking for a job remember, it's all in the numbers!
No.92
1 comment:
Speaking of numbers:
Thank you visitor number 7000 to Vervicidal Tendencies.
The management is humbled.
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